Still...

95 Degree Days, 8 Months Preggo and Zero Patience.

2010-06-14T18:23:00.005-04:00

It's sweltering in Atlanta. It's been 95 plus degrees for days now. Ugh. And I think the last time I was on here, I was preggers, was it back in January. So you know now, I'm about ready to pop, 70 degrees is extra warm for me.

I'm a horrible excuse for a blogger, LOL, I know this. But mind you, I never called myself a blogger. I'm just a young lady, who loves to write, who happens to keep a blog- of sorts... LOL.

Static on the homefront. We won't discuss it. We'll just hope and work towards an amiable solution and keep it moving onwards and upwards right fam? Still, it has me ready to blast Ready To Die and break every piece of glass and ceramic in our lovely ranch home here on the Eastside.

So the baby's name: Tiffani. Hubby decided on it, I chose to end it with an 'i'. He says that Tiffan[y]/[i] is a good, strong, "normal" name. And because I threw the 'Ka' on the front of Kamaia's name, which he always disagreed with ("You just had to make it ghetto..."), I figured I owed him this lil' piece. LOL. So Tiffani Blake is coming in less than a month to join her big sis Kamaia Brodie.

Other than that, I've been steady mobbin'. Still doing some work for Ozone under my dude Randy, writing for Soul Train under the homie Quia. Picked up posting a bit for a vet, Branden Peters over at Kuhvet. My writing is coming along- finally. Now for the rest of life...

Touching Base...

2010-01-28T20:28:00.005-05:00

I don't really even have an excuse for my ridiculous absence this time. I mean, your girl's been going in, working and writing pretty frequently but I could've dropped by even if only for a sentence or two... :o/ So for those actions (or lack of) I offer my deepest apologies. *grin* Now that that's squared away...

Instead of the big wedding smack dab in the middle of the recession, we (J and I) decided to go to City Hall in NY and do it that way. It was all his idea.

He figured it would be the closest thing to special we can afford to do right now. "I know you never saw yourself getting married anywhere but home." That's what he said to me, before I melted. So sweet right? Well, due to the force of the universe (honestly, so much bad shit was happening), we missed our flight and we only had that day that we were flying up to pick up the marriage license in Brooklyn. We still managed to have a decent time, despite J getting aggy once or twice an hour, over the ruined nuptials. We still had an alright trip. We stayed in a hotel, like a block outta Times Square. We visited my family. He took tourist pics. LOL.

Keiko's doing great in Pre-K. She was Student of the Month in December. She turned in a lost dollar in her classroom and was recognized for her Random Act of Kindness by the principal on the school's TV channel. LOL. You know she was feeling herself. BTW, her principal doesn't speak very well to be a principal. And I always catch her giving me the side eye, WTF is that about? Maybe because I look so young. *shrugs*

Anyways, it's not an accent type thing or a speech impediment either- trust me. I know the difference between thick accents, stutters, and plain ol' terrible pronounciation and diction.

She called out the names of all the kids who won a spot in the Pre-K lottery last year and nearly fucked up every one of 'em. I mean, I know some of us can create some funky names for our kids but it was like, she wasn't even following the age old rule of "sounding it out". Everybody's name wasn't extra, there were a couple of 'Bob' type names in there. LOL.

I'm leaving with this. I'll be back in a jiff though...

-Nadine

"Even if I Gotta Do it on My Own..."

2009-08-24T03:34:00.003-04:00

My theme song of the week. Currently feeling like, I'm going in. The people around me don't agree, but I'm not into the bullshit drama and I'm not apologizing for my behaviour. Nipsey and Drake feel me.

Should be Embarrassed...

2009-08-22T20:14:00.004-04:00

My Twitter friend, broken cool (who has a dope site BTW, y'all should check it out) does this series of posts: Silly Shit in His I-Pod or something like that. LOL. And I just thought of one in mine...

That "Ice Cream Paint Job"?!? Bangin'! LOL. And the lil' dude is talking about absolutely nothing. I had to stop posting and look his name up just now, Dorrough- from Texas of course. That just tells you how random my promotion of this track really is.

Just a Few Words...

2009-08-22T19:35:00.006-04:00

Okay, so I'm sitting here, going back and forth about whether or not I should post anything. There's not really much on my mind that you guys would care about anyway, besides my ongoing grind season or as Joc would say: my "grind flu". *snicker*

But in my last post, I did say that I would be better about this. And R.E. chastised me in the Comments section, so I feel like I pretty much HAVE to. LOL.

My baby's gone for the weekend, spending the night at Grandma's, and I don't have a damn thing planned besides chores. Someone needs to hit their homie with some free tickets to something... LOL. But at least, I can listen to some new music and maybe write a bit.

This writing thing is actually taking off, I think. Finally! Damn. *grin*

I mean, maybe I'm just going harder than before, but I swear, by next summer, I'm gonna have it working for me. Lord willin'.

I'm A Jerk... I Know...

2009-08-09T11:29:00.007-04:00

Damn. I ain't mean to leave y'all hanging... :o) Trust me. It's all love. It's just that since that last post, I've been busy as hell, writing like crazy, rebuilding this portfolio, hearing tons of new music and trying to network. Not to mention, I got a new 9 to 5 and they are pretty liberal with the website blocks. :o(

This summer's been a hectic and tragic one pretty much all the way through huh? I'ma do my personal rundown:

1. Michael Jackson's Passing: Very sad, feels like your cousin died. Because despite all the strangeness that followed MJ, he really WAS the greatest entertainer, IMO (and a lot of other people's), who lived. And I feel like, it's a shame that my kid will never know the power of that "MoonWalker" flick (we watched that VHS RELIGIOUSLY in grade school). :o)

2. VIBE Folded: I was SICK. I'd wanted to write for VIBE since I was a young teenager- never got the opportunity. I got really close though. LOL. I'd been reading it even before then, starting with the Treach issue, cover to cover. In its later years, it wasn't what it had been, but it was STILL the best "urban" magazine at news stands. :o(

3. Steve McNair's Murder by Mistress: SMDH. I feel for that man's kids. From what I understand, he was a good hearted dude, he was charitable and kind, and good as hell at football. It's bad because now, in death, his image is tarnished (in a sense).
He handled the situation badly, and his kids without a Daddy because: a. He couldn't keep his dick in his pants and stay home, and b. He wasn't been smarter about it, and more discreet. He was tricking on this young girl HEAVY, and she was in love, she had already told the fam that they were getting married, and I think I heard that he'd MET the family. Why do that if y'all are just f*cking? Now she's pissed because you're not leaving your wife and kids, and you fall ASLEEP over there? Just a REALLY sad situation.

4. Kelis and Nas's Divorce: LOL. He tried to be cute and say he wasn't paying for shit, she got him for CRAZY moola. I thought they would be together forever, quite honestly *shrugs* Call me a romantic... It sucks, because they've had a baby born into the drama.
*Note: I'm not condoning gold digging by any means, but if your estranged wife is very much preggo, and you're no where to be found AND you're acting like it's too much to act like you give a f*ck, then yeah... She has the right to tax your ass.

There's more but I don't wanna talk y'all to death so I'm leaving it here...
But if I'm ever gone for a minute and you happen to find yourself missing me ;o)...
I'm on Twitter of course, and R.E.'s is another good spot to go visit, he's funny and he's always on that new ish.

Who I Saw Last Night...

2009-05-03T13:50:00.007-04:00

Photo courtesy of Maurice Garland.

So your girl finally went to the Drake concert. Good deal right? Umm... It was okay. General admission and the show started at ten, so by the time I got to the city from Lithonia, it was just after 9 p.m.. The line wrapped around the building, with what seemed to be all of the AU Center, current students and alumni. A lot of young girls. I'd go as far to say, more than half the audience were females. In dresses and heels. Not your typical rap show. Just before stepping inside, I noticed that my damn camera didn't have batteries. Aargh!

The opener Danny! got booed relentlessly then got sensitive about it. Took it personal and let the young kids see him sweat. SMH. Jaspects were up next and they did very well. I dig them, definitely. The crowd, males(!) and females, surged and chanted, "WE WANT DRAKE!" for a while. He came out, girls shrieked. I felt old as fuck. And hot. LOL.

From what I understand Usher was brought out onstage, for like, 5 seconds (went to the bar and missed him, LOL). Eric Sermon, of EPMD and Def Squad, was there. Teyana Taylor came out on stage at the show's end. Trey Songz was there, of course (his cute self). Would've gone to the afterparty but... *shrugs*.

Video courtesy of Smoking Section.

Drake - "Successful" (Featuring Trey Songz) from The Smoking Section on Vimeo.

Nice To Look At...

2009-05-03T13:46:00.002-04:00

Malice Video Blog 1 from Malice of the Clipse on Vimeo.

I told y'all about the boy Malice a little while ago. Love his lyricism. And his nasally voice. Cocoa skin... Bright eyes... LOL. You guys get the idea. Seemed even sexier after I saw this video. SMDH.

Something Nice to Look At...

2009-04-28T00:03:00.002-04:00

Damn. Am I the only one who noticed that this dude was fine from the get-go in the New York series on VH1?!? LOL. And I don't even mess with Uptown cats like that... He has a nice kick collection also...

Catch Up...

2009-04-16T22:34:00.003-04:00

LOL. I'm fucking up huh? I know, I know... I'll try to do better. I just did a catch-up post but so much has happened in the last month, personally. I've been writing a lot more, when editors around the city told me I wasn't decent, and "where the fuck did [I] go to school?" I'm good now. LOL. I knew I wasn't crazy! Contributing to Thank God I'm Famous, under Sickamore. Looking to get my hands into something else in addition. I'm hella excited though, sheesh, finally, at age 26.

Keiko got into Pre-Kindergarten for the FREE FREE! (grin) I'm excited for her. Her daddy is sad about it. He feels like she has the rest of her life for all that. She's too smart to be kicking it with the babies at daycare though. She's ecstatic- can't wait for August. In GA, they have a lottery for every zone school, so out of like, 60 4-year-olds they only pick 20 names out of a decorated box! I coulda fell the fuck out, right there, in the school library when they called her name. It's not that we couldn't have put her in a private Pre-K but I think it was the build up and the amazing fact that my little baby is actually going to school... WTH?

As a sidenote, your girl is off to the Drake concert out here in two weeks! And as a sidenote to the sidenote, LOL, here's an editorial I wrote relating to that Young Man. Hit the link.

Catch Up.

2009-03-10T20:48:00.003-04:00

So I just checked my blog today to see how long it's been since I last posted. Wow. Two weeks huh? Okay. But look, I've got great excuses: Time with the boyfriend. Time with Keiko. Making connections on Twitter. Figuring out a game plan as far as writing, getting back in school, and copping another FT. (No more serving as a gig, if I can help it.) Umm, oh yeah, and planning a wedding. LOL. Yes. Your homie is engaged. I'm excited. It was like, I had to take some time a few months ago, to make sure that things were right and I wouldn't be effing up my life or anyone else's. Once I found that he was willing to be That Guy Through Anything, I was good. And now we're good. So he proposed. And we're engaged. Holla.

On Repeat This Evening: Shit Popped Off- Dr.Dre ft. T.I.

2009-02-23T02:59:00.003-05:00

Well, this track has been floating around on the Internets for about three days now. ZShare's been acting like a bitch on the laptop, so I ended up having to cop it elsewhere tonight after checking NahRight. It's one of two songs Tip's on with Dre on the boards. The other one is called "Topless" w/ Nas (!) and he actually rides that beat REALLY well, for it to be SOOO West Coast. Anyways, I'm gone. Enjoy.

Catch Up!

2009-02-18T21:41:00.005-05:00

So in the time that I've been gone, I've become addicted to danyelliott's podcasts every week. The brainchild of married couple Danyel Smith and Elliott Wilson, (professionals in this Journalism thing of ours) it's an hour-long podcast where they talk about whatever they feel like talking about with a bit of Twitter talk mixed in. I love how they go back and forth and Dani calls Elliott out on his cursing, it's cute and entertaining.

Keiko got her Chuck E. Cheese birthday party, Dora cake and all. And all of her guests showed up late as hell on that CP time. She had fun nonetheless, so we were happy.

I turned 26 a week and a half later and had an awesome time in the city. One of my best friends out here, Rasheed, organized the evening. We started off in Midtown at a lounge, moved it to the "boys club" (Yay!), then capped it off at Landmark Diner by GA State. I was the only one that recognized DJ Jelly! Been down here long enough right?

Oh and before I forget, Jarvis has been a bit more willing to get into what I like, so I finally pulled him into coming out to Broke and Boujee with me last week. BnB is a monthly party out here that some people would categorize as a "hipster" gathering, LOL. I don't necessarily know how much truth there is in that, because I think the definition itself is a box.

It's like, I've had issues with defining myself, until fairly recently when I accepted what I've always known: I'm everywhere and nowhere, so to speak. I'm not all the way hipster, but I'm not all the way "normal". I rock Tims, but not Rocawear (at least not all day), I'd rather Married to the Mob. I like heels but I'd prefer Supras and Nikeys. Am I weird? Yes. And that's straight. 'Cause the nigg@ coming around. He said he had a great time (although he felt like the only "normal cat" in there. LOL.). Shout to Fadia, she's a damn mastermind. And Hannibal's a beast behind the cam. Made us look like we were in the comics.

My Newest Obsession: Drake "So Far Gone"

2009-02-18T21:12:00.002-05:00

So I see the Internets will force me into obtaining extra storage, between Charles Hamilton's ever-growing encyclopedia of mixtapes (Every. Fucking. Week.) and everyone else's loose tracks here and there... Sheesh. LOL. I'm happy about the influx of dope ish though, at the very top of '09. Including Drake's newest mixtape "So Far Gone" . I got my link from Randy's. The YouTube clip is of one my favorites on there: "Successful". That hook is me. Holla.

What I'm Currently Obsessed With (Pt. II): Charles Hamilton- Windows Media Player

2009-01-27T15:17:00.001-05:00

The beat on this is smart. The first time I actually paid attention to this cat was a couple months ago when he actually came down to the A, for studio sessions. He got on Greg Street's show and went on and on about blogging and Myspace being his primary marketing outlet. I guess he wasn't playing (smile).

What I'm Currently Obsessed With: Charles Hamilton - Theories Of Wine

2009-01-27T15:12:00.004-05:00

So I downloaded a Charles mixtape a couple weeks ago from The Smoking Section, and once I gave it a full listen, I decided that this was one of my favorite songs. I dunno. I can't really get with the Sonic tip he's on (loved the game as a kid, don't know about rocking the screen tees), but no one can deny that this kid spits. LOL.

The Gap Between Us and Our Baby.

2009-01-15T13:20:00.003-05:00

In 2004, when I was 21, I took one of those digital pregnancy tests & discovered that for the 1st time ever there was a baby growing inside of me. J. and I weren't necessarily official then, but we were best friends who figured we could make it work. Our little girl is 4 yrs old in 6 days & I'm almost freaking the fuck out. LOL.

Music stimulated her in the womb, but even then she was crazy particular. She loved John Legend (still does); I'd put it on in the car & she'd dance around in there. This was before he officially dropped, I had the audio of him performing at the Knitting Factory that year from a PR friend. She has perfect pitch when she sings Jazmin Sullivan, or anyone else for that matter. Keiko can hear a song two times and remember the words, she can listen to half a song and catch the melody. She gets down to Colin Munroe and Black Milk with her mommy.

We figured being young parents, we'd be able to relate to her better than my parents related to me. But I've recently begun to realize that eventually the gap will widen, especially as she gets deeper into discovering her own personality. Who she is... I'll always be aware of what the youth is "into" because that's how I hope to make my living, but I'm not always gonna feel her on what she's into. Gush about Biggie, Pac or even some living rappers to kids today and you're an "old fogie". Damn, I'm like, 25. But that's the cycle right? At a certain point we're all "old fogies" but 1994 doesn't seem like that long ago (pout)!

In 10 years, when & if Soulja Boy becomes the tycoon (i.e. 50 Cent, Puffy) that these folk are touting him as, my baby will be a high school freshman that views Jay as retro. In the car the other day, she told me to "turn the radio loud" when "Kiss Me Through the Phone" came on. And commenced to singing through the refrains & humming through the raps, doing a little diddy-bop with her head & shoulders.

My Newest Obsession: Joe Budden TV

2009-01-14T22:39:00.004-05:00

Joey Budden is one of the funniest rappers since Redman. LOL. I effin' swear. I liked him since the Clue tapes he debuted on in the late 90s, but forgot about him just as quickly with "Pump It Up" (which the boyfriend reminded me of two days ago). Was back in love with him after "Who" this past summer. Lately I've been on him and Joe Budden TV tough. And although I can't relate to dudes watching his videos for his sidekick/ girl Tahira's ass, I find modest pleasure in the delight they share with each other, even in talking about absolutely nothing (smile).

"Damn- Things Done Changed..."

2009-01-08T18:53:00.002-05:00

A Message from the Brooklyn Tourism Board from jeff on Vimeo.

What in the hell man? I left Brooklyn ten years ago (at the end of January); everytime I go back it's a little different but I can still make my way around. It's still home. I say all that to say this: I don't remember too many of these mofos coming through my block. LOL. Another crazy vid from It's The Real. Saw this over at Brown Derby earlier. Title of this post, compliments of Biggie (wink).

My Newest Obsession: Colin Munroe Feat. Joell Ortiz "Piano Lessons" Vid.

2009-01-08T18:32:00.004-05:00

Shout to KJ the Great for reminding me to download Colin's mixtape last month. Thanks homie. And shout to Randy Exclusive for putting it out there. The whole mix is crazy, on some different ish. Eclectic, 1980s, alt-rock, poppy, with ballsy features from up and coming hip hop artists mixed in (I love you Mickey Factz! AND your Supras! LOL.). "Cannonball" remains one of my favorites. Peep it.

The Perfect Christmas Eve.

2008-12-27T01:50:00.005-05:00

This past Wednesday, Christmas Eve, Keiko and I spent the night at her Daddy/the ex(?)/boyfriend's house (that was our house two months ago). It was a good couple of days. We talked over Hen, Chinese food, and Pop Secret. Keiko acted a damn fool. LOL. We ate, then drank, got drunk, he and his sister got hilarious, then solemn. He ended up understanding my reasoning behind "the break", by Christmas Day. Funny, for as long as we've known each other (seven years), stuff keeps coming... It just seems like we would've knocked all of that out by now. But I'm learning that that's not how it works...

Keiko got sooo much crap that she'll probably play with for a couple weeks and retire. Then revisit.

I got a dope ass Hellz Bellz jacket. And my boyfriend back.

My Newest Obsession: Clipse "Road Till the Casket Drops"

2008-12-18T16:03:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I really wanted to name this post "Nigg@ I'm Obsessed With" (Malice, the one in the front, is like, one of the finest muh fuckers in the rap game! Ooh. I've always thought that.), but dudes read this blog sometimes and I figured I should provide something that would interest them as well. LOL. I've been loving the Clipse since the start, my homie calls them the "ultimate shit talkers". You gotta love 'em though. Here's the newest mix from these dudes. All the true fans already have this downloaded.

My Newest Obsession: Colin Munroe ft. Drake - Cannonball

2008-12-15T02:13:00.003-05:00

Heard this on the newest Drake mix that I downloaded the other day. I don't really know why I like this song, but I can't get it out of my head (smile). He's from Toronto too, and defines his genre as Alternative Pop, but he gets respect from the rappers (just like Mr. Mayer). He blew up when he dropped his version of "Flashing Lights" in January of this year. Here's some more info for him at Vibe.

Pseudo-Nivea Ass.

2008-12-14T05:40:00.006-05:00

So, tonight as I was riding up I-85 from Buckhead, my beloved Maxima overheated. I'd been working since 10 a.m. and ended up stranded on the highway at 3:30 a.m.. I'm pretty resourceful, and my dad's a mechanic so, I grabbed my flashlight and a jug of water from the trunk and did the radiator thing. Then my fucking battery died. I HAD to laugh and shake my head. I called for help & once help arrived & all was situated, I checked my cell out of habit & saw that my homie D. called & apparently left a text AND a voice message. This was odd, because we never speak after a certain time. Anyways, I read the text and it reads verbatim: "Don't fuckin call my man anymore Bitch!!!!!!!" Yes, with all the exclamation points and everything. LMAO.

Y'all already know the state of mind I'm currently in: just left my kid's dad because I felt like I was being resented. Once I left, I found that a lot of my reasons for leaving were because of my inner need to accomplish certain things. These were feelings that I'd actually projected onto him. I need to understand me and why I can be really hard on myself a lot of times. So far, in doing this, I've found that my relationship with my mom is a major factor. Working on that. I'm also thinking of going a different direction with the "9-5", as well as starting to take the initiative (yet again) to carry out my ideal goal of writing for a living. In general, I've been trying to be more positive minded and stick to my decision to leave the love of my life in hopes that I'll find myself (corny right?) and find him again. I know he's dealing with new chicks for the physical, but I don't have any desire to date right now. And I'm fine with that.

So imagine my surprise at the gall of this girl. I text: "Who's this?" but I'm thinking, "D. gotta be fucking with me. He just told me the whole situation with this girl the other day." Apparently ol' girl stayed the night a couple weeks ago and went through his phone when he was asleep. Texts were sent, voice messages were left, chaos ensued. LOL. So she answered: "D's girlfriend!!!" I was so shocked, but the words came so easy: "Oh. YOU the crazy one he told me about... LOL. You funny. And if D. wasn't my homie and that alone, I'd locate you and bust your head open for calling me out my name. Talk to your man, you fucking bird, while you're texting me @ 3 a.m." With all the real shit I'm going through, I almost cried laughing! I really coulda crushed her world too, and told her, her whole background as described by D. himself. If she only knew how that dude talks about her- AND the rest of 'em.

My New Obsession: Frankie Valli /The Four Seasons - Beggin' (Pilooski re-edit)

2008-12-11T03:37:00.001-05:00

What the hell is it with these U.K. experimental cuts making their way into U.S. commercials? I love it! This is the joint from the Adidas Originals commercial with Jeezy, DMC, Red, Meth, Missy and Estelle. "Beggin'" originally was a mid-1960s hit by American group Frank Valli and the Four Seasons (LOL @ the "Four Seasons". How corny!), but the Pilooski cat remixed it last year. His Myspace reads "Italian Pop/ Psychedelic", but it also claims Paris as his home. *shrugs shoulders* Eh, whatever. This is dope.

Bigger Fish to Fry...

2008-12-11T02:05:00.003-05:00

Didn't know this had a video...Perfect.

So now what? That's what I've basically been asking myself for the better part of a month. Life keeps going, although you may feel like shit is faltering all around you. You're not ready to accept certain things until you're not left with any other option. The BIG thing though is persevering right? It's not like it's just me. I have to get right for Keiko.

Is that shit supposed to be this hard though? Confusion, frustration, just a general sense of loss? Is this normal? Could there be a way to just forget that you ever felt this strongly for someone- ever? Work was so hard today. I'm mad I'm even admitting all this. I didn't want to sit at home, but by the time I got to work, I didn't want to be there either, outside of the money of course (smile). I'm prepared to put the big plan into action though, I'm sure that it'll be enough to take my mind offa this dude. He's dating, but I'm not ready for that shit. I know I'm not. This time I took from him was supposed to be for myself, but I feel like the longer I stay to myself, the more I'll only think of him. And he's not soley thinking of me- right? I don't know. Everything is just too much.

My New Obsession: Cornershop - Candy Man

2008-12-08T04:36:00.003-05:00

Ever since the first time I saw the Nikey "Chalk" commercial a couple days ago, I'd been jonesin' to hear this song at my leisure. I effin' LOVE it! Shout to Dres the Beatnik for putting me on to the details...

P-Funky, UK Hip-hop, clap to this...

Everybody Hates Chris- Vid.

2008-12-08T04:04:00.001-05:00

I couldn't catch a leak on this song for nada a couple months ago! And I sooo needed one. I love this joint. And I'm glad he did this video for it. The game is crazy now where you can really take your marketing to YouTube and let it ride...

Damn R-ra...

2008-12-08T03:53:00.001-05:00

I'd been meaning to post this for a minute. It's crazy old, but it still makes me giggle. Enjoy. Or cringe. Or do both.

Live With Your Decision...

2008-12-05T00:11:00.005-05:00

I let myself slip the other day. I let my situation leave my train of thought for a second and found myself hoping for something that was irrational and unreasonable. And I could kick myself.

Chilled with the ex all day Thursday. We sat in the house and watched movies, ate nothing but candy, popcorn and nachos while Keiko played with her aunt. I think my mistake was listening too closely and forgetting that I did have a plan when I left. And I need to live with the fact that I did leave. And if he's not there by the time I'm done with my plan, that shit was my decision... He asked if I'd been dating the other day and I told him 'no', but maybe I should.

Word Chris?

2008-11-27T05:02:00.002-05:00

Okay so I saw this on Different Kitchen yesterday, and Ian was like how he saw that it "made its rounds a few days" before- whatever. I'm posting it anyways (smile). I can't lie and say that I wasn't somewhat feeling that Young Gunz album when it dropped, but they promptly fell off. Nonetheless, here's Young Chris making a strong comeback over live background!

Q Virgin.

2008-11-27T04:05:00.005-05:00

So tonight was uneventful for the most part but I did get to experience MJQ Concourse for the first time. It was straight. When you first walk in (through a dark tunnel, so you know what the rest of the club is bound to look like), you can go to the left for the headbanger music or to the right through another tunnel for something more soulful. I went to the right with the bohos. It smelled like, "hot". Not necessarily like garbage, or ass, but maybe sex. Hot sex. Like everyone in there had just taken a shower, popped a couple pills, then had sex on the dance floor in between the ravers and make-believe B-boys. I saw more than a few perform 360 degree turns! LOL. It was chill though- different. I thought I saw Dres the Beatnik off in there too (Google him). It can't be a Velvet night, everytime you go out...

Breakfast with Tom.

2008-11-24T01:20:00.007-05:00

On Saturday night I went to the city to visit my friends tending bar. After 'bout the 5th drink I ended up chair dancing to "Single Ladies" at Strip. LOL. Anyways, my homie Tommy was up there closing out and we decided to get some French Toast at Landmark on GSU's campus. Once we get in, we start talking about our respective relationship issues and conversation gets pretty deep when Tom breaks his neck to check a female walking past our table.

So me being the woman that I am, remind Tommy that I'm not one of his homeBOYS, and I can't empathize with his affinity for fat asses. He shrugs my statement off and proceeds to tell me that "sometimes you just gotta look, ain't nothing wrong with looking". Then, "Ugh, I'm disapponted. Her face ain't really end up being what I figured it would be. Oh well, can't get 'em all." He called it a "heat check" and laughed. I was puzzled until he explained the definition, then I laughed.

Here it is: Heat Check (heet chek) noun. An occasion on which a basketball player takes a questionable (i.e., bad) shot in order to determine how "hot" he is, usually after hitting several shots in a row. Provided by Basketbawlful.

"Hey Sexy..."

2008-11-22T03:22:00.003-05:00

When I woke up today, I kissed my kid and had breakfast with her. Then I boiled some water for tea and sat at the computer, ready to make rounds before dipping to work. Sent a couple e-mails, read the standard blogs, and sent a couple updates to Twitter (Maurice, where you at? Thought you were on there too.). Went to Myspace to check for messages- I had one from Some Guy: "Hey sexy? How u doin'?" Hit delete. I went to work at 3 p.m., just got home at 3 a.m., and made my rounds online again. I checked Myspace last: I had two messages, five friend requests, all undesirable, one of the dudes actually looked like he decided, "I'ma upload this profile pic that makes me look like a serial rapist. That's a good idea." One of the guys was like, "Add me. It won't let me add you!!!!" Just like that- with all the exclamation points.

It's like the minute Jarvis and I broke up and I changed my status, I get these weirdos sending messages. Wow. Do people even meet up through Myspace anymore?

I'm Currently Digging this Kid...

2008-11-19T04:14:00.002-05:00

Drake (Feat. Mickey Factz & Travis) - Overdose

Drake? Word? I'd heard of this cat eons ago, but I never got around to Myspace-ing him. Unfortunate, because I wish I was the fly muhfucker to put others on to him. At this point though... Vibe has a write-up on him on stands this month. I finally gave him a listen recently after Randy gave him another piece of positive promo over at his spot. All of dude's beats are ridiculous, his flow is decent, he also sings, and it doesn't hurt that he has a couple of high profile homies (i.e. Trey Songz, Lil' Wayne). BTW, if he looks familiar, he used to be on Degrassi The Next Generation (a Canadian TV show tradition aimed at The Teens) for like, eight years. My 16 year old niece used to love watching that show. I was looking at him at first like, "Umm... Naaah..."

Summing It Up...

2008-11-17T16:20:00.002-05:00

Poor Kanye. As much as we all tease about his brattiness and tantrum throwing, he really has had a rough year. In addition to the loss of his moms, this breakup ish ain't no joke.

Run On...

2008-11-17T04:04:00.003-05:00

Okay so I've got a lot to speak a little bit on, all kinda in the same vein though. Have patience...

This week I didn't really have money like that to just be doing whatever, but I had an incident yesterday where I had to go to the ER (uninsured mind you), that same day, my radiator on the good old Maxima basically said 'Fuuck you' (a la Cam'ron circa '98). So once your financial plans for the week are quashed due to no fault of your own, you just get to the point where it's like 'fuck it, I'll make it up.' So Tuesday night, I'm going to Straits for dinner and drinks...

Speaking of Straits, everyone I deal with knows I'm looking forward to the release of "Theatre", like seriously (Premo on a beat- really? Damn. He's going hard.). But I shocked myself today, listening to "Chopped and Screwed" for the quadillionth time, feeling like I might cop that T-Pain too. WTF? Most of the time, that computer voice drives me crazy, but Pain's got it to the point where I'm like, "Damn. It does work for him. Eh (shrugging shoulders). I'll take a sip of the Kool-Aid." LOL.

Everytime I think of Luda releasing an album, I remember that his DJ and I started off being friends like six months before the release of his first, when he blew up. And both of our lives were so much different then. Then I think: if that much can change within that amount of time, how different will my life be in another 3 years (if that)?

Anyways, in keeping with 2/3rds of my run-on sentence of a post, here's a vid of T-Pain and Luda on Jimmy Kimmel (peep this: T is actually doing aiight without that damn Auto Tune- and he's playing the piano! Am I the last person on Earth that didn't know he could actually play an instrument?!?). I'm hella late with this though, maybe twelve hours. LOL. Damn Internets...

*Shout to ChicaGorilla for bringing this to my attention on Twitter.

Whaaa?!?

2008-11-14T01:12:00.003-05:00

LOL. Word 'Ye? A slice of Humble Pie huh? Never thought I see the day when Kanye West checks himself. SMH. Long overdue though.

"I wanna apologize 2 Jeret Leto for fronting on him. I read my quote on Perez and was like damn that was wack of me. I've actually posted his vids on my blog that
had incredible cinematography. He actually covered one of my songs.
Like they said on Anchorman... You eat shit Ron Burgandy! Yes, I eat shit for that one"

*Found on Kanye's site.

Here's what he initially said, in regards to the winners of this year's MTV EMAs, if you missed it:

He adds, “Britney Spears over Rihanna? Are you serious? I mean f**king Jared Leto? He’s my boy but he shouldn’t have won over some of those other artists.”

*Courtesy of The YBF.

What I've Got To Look Forward To...

2008-11-13T19:26:00.007-05:00

My ex was supposed to spend Wednesday with our daughter. We said we'd meet up at a midway point on my way to work. It was something that was decided on Tuesday evening around 6 p.m.; Wednesday morning at approximately 7 a.m. he sends a text like: "Could you drop her off at the house (in Lithonia) or at daycare (in Snellville)? I just got in the house." Both locations are about 40 minutes out of the way, and by the time I actually woke up to receive the message, it would've made me an hour late for work, if I actually did all that.

I was annoyed at the question being what it was. If you want to see your kid but you decide to go out the previous night, let me know that you may be out late and the next morning's plan may have to change, before the next morning. Then once I started thinking about it, like really thinking about it, where are you going the night before, where you're coming in the house at 7 a.m? Especially on a Tuesday/Wednesday? You gotta be fucking right? Probably one of those work skeezers that've been thirsting after him since we had Keiko. I shouldn't care because we're not together, but we just broke up. So in addition to my being annoyed at him making me late for work, I was also irritated because you know...

So today, after that whole fiasco, I considered the idea of us never being together again which he assured me of, and I thought of the fact that I'm actually single again. WTF? Dating now- scares the shit outta me. People are crazy. Locating the jumpoff should be easy, but genuine companionship [sigh]? There's a cat at work from Jersey, who saw my "all blue graduation cap" the other day and I guess that made him comfortable enough to break ice with me. The guy kinda creeps me out, always starting comments or questions off with "baby": "Baby, when you got down here?", "Baby, you rep Brooklyn huh?", "Baby, where you stay at?" I'm like: I don't even know you! If this is what it's gonna be like, I'll pass...

Nothing Left To Talk About...

2008-11-11T00:57:00.005-05:00

This "break up" shit is harder than I thought. I said before that I wouldn't do too much detail on that side of my personal biz on here, at least not regarding this, not right now... It's all too fresh.

I made a decision that in his words could be the "best decision or the worst" in my life. Maybe if it wasn't a situation where we were supposed to be working towards raising a daughter together, it wouldn't be this hard. Now we both have to rearrange everything. It's hardest to cope with at night, after you clock outta work, chill for a bit, take care of the tangible things. When you close your eyes at night and think of where things were less than two months ago, it's unnerving. I dunno, just felt like posting, couldn't sleep, can't really think straight...

Look At This Dude...

2008-11-09T17:31:00.003-05:00

LOL. Jay had to be like 16 years old in this pic, with all that jewelry on. Everybody looked so funny in the '80s. I was like the freshest grade-schooler though, in my white on white 5411s (with the straps out of course), Thinsulate gloves that showed the pretty swirls when it was cold outside and kelly green Triple Fat Goose. Get like me...

*Found pic on The Smoking Section.

Somebody Pinch Me...

2008-11-08T19:56:00.004-05:00

If you take a look at my last post, you see the anxiety and anticipation I felt leading up to the final Election Day count. By the time 10 p.m. rolled around, I found myself wishing I was somewhere in the city celebrating this monumental moment with my people. So proud.

So I hadn't heard this Jay joint, "History" till today; I saw that it was out but decided to wait a bit. Adore it. It's perfect.

"Where are you victory?/ I need you desperately/ Not just for the moment- to make history... I been waiting for this hour/ History you're ours..."

"Four Hours or Four Years. You Choose."

2008-11-04T18:44:00.003-05:00

I love Sir Luscious! (smile) He called up to Ryan Cameron today to talk about his voting experience today, and dropped that opening quote on them peoples. He said that he went out at 5:15 this morning with his wife and they were numbers 6 and 7. Swizz Beatz called and said he flew down from NY to put his in. Of course, Puff called V-103 this morning, to urge everyone to go out.

Elle, from Ryan's show, said that she prayed last night, and couldn't sleep, she was so excited.

I got so many damn texts today: pseudo-inspirational, funny as shit, super serious. My inbox is damn near full.

The lines were way shorter today in GA than last week when I voted. I waited 3.5 hours on Friday. People were in and out today. Sooo many first time voters, and you know why they're just now voting, but it's all good man, it's a beautiful thing to see people take something seriously enough these days to speak out in numbers. Like massive numbers. Enough to make a difference.

Twenty minutes from where my parents live in West Bubble, between the woods and the Confed flags, they were with the bullshit today. The few Democrats that live out there, went to vote and found that the Democratic ticket wasn't even on the ballot.

There are so many "Victory Parties" here in Atlanta tonight. Watching the reports. In halter dresses. Sipping snifters of Hen (smile).

I mean, voting already feels good, but this year, it was like, unspeakable. Now black kids can come up with that in their mindset- for real. I never thought I'd see it in my lifetime, and I think it's just because I'd never seen it, and there's still so much hate.

If Obama doesn't win, I may cry a little. Not just for selfish reasons, or future tax returns, but because he would've gotten so close... They still keeping our history from us in school save for one month a year. This shit is historical. And no one can keep it from us.

Bad News= Bad Dudes.

2008-11-02T19:57:00.003-05:00

To piggyback off of Mr. Garland's post a few days ago, there are a few cats today that make watching the news less than painful/depressing. Here is my favorite couple- both from CNN. What does that tell you? CNN is like the Ford Modeling Agency of the talking heads world. Yum yum. And we in the A, get them all to ourselves!

The first- Ron Lemon. Very cute. I saw him today with his hair cut lower than it is here...

The second- T.J. Holmes. Fine as __. LOL. I heard he used to mess with Chili though. And every other halfway cute heffa out here, is itching to get their hooks in him.

The First Day...

2008-11-02T15:11:00.003-05:00

Other than my personal life feeling like it's in shambles, real life continues in real time, so your girl is pushing on...

The job situation is looking positive, which is really all I could ask for. Of all the years I've been serving tables, I've never actually seen in the employee manual, a clause about blogging. LOL. The HR person that was moderating the orientation Friday was adamant about going into detail. First of all, I was at a long table with most of the front of the house staff, who really had an attitude like, someone was forcing them to be there. There were a few young white "frat guys", a couple Barbie dolls, none seemed like they'd last too long. Everyone was just completely unresponsive. Like, the woman would make little jokes and shit, corny or whatever, but no one even cracked half a smile. Fine. So we get to the blog section right? Here's the conversation:

"Okay, blogging. Does anyone here know what a blog is?"

[the jerks mumble, I nod 'yes' and smile]

She defines "webblog", and continues in saying that it's fine to keep one as long as the restaurant is not mentioned in a negative light. She warns that if it is, they will trace it back to whoever's blog it is. At this point, I'm trying to figure out how I'll be talking about work on here without drawing attention to the place itself. LOL. The jerks murmur and damn near shrug their shoulders.

"I'm sure none of you spend hours blogging anyways."

Like she was trying to get her cool points back with these people she just met. Whatever. I know the stigma being a "blogger", and I don't feel like a nerd, but maybe I'm in denial (smile). So anyways, I figured, I'd do it like I've been doing it. I never speak badly about the place itself- just the patrons who get ig'nant. Or if I see some super fly shit that needs to be mentioned. BTW, ChicaGorilla if you're reading this... I'ma be like, across the street from you then, and I believe I'ma need those Jeremy Scott Wing Adidases in a mens' 6.5! (smile)

Do Remember!

2008-11-02T14:47:00.003-05:00

I'm on my old school Clue drop today... LOL. Peter Gunz from the Bronx, recall that guy? Had the banger with Lord Tariq when I was in high school: "Deja Vu (Uptown Baby)". Well, I'd been hearing about his look-a-like son Corey for a minute. His verse on "A Milli" is official- certain radio stations only play that version. Dude is like, 20 years old, doing an amazing job of spitting type-ridiculous. Anyways, found this vid on Kaos' site... Listen to him in the limo!

Three Months Till I'm Four Years From Thirty...

2008-10-30T01:11:00.003-04:00

February 6th is the date of my 26th birthday, lord willin', I'll be able to celebrate it. I'm thankful to have made it to this point three months before that date but believe me- I'm terrified of getting older. It's actually the fear of getting so much closer to 30. I'm nowhere near where I'd like to be at that milestone, and now I only have four years! Under pressure.

I was gonna go deeper into that train of thought, but I figured I'd spare y'all. And talk about my plans, or lack of them...

Keiko's birthday is 2 weeks before mine (Aquarian like Mommy!), and for her 4th, I'm thinking-Chuckie Cheese bash and maybe cupcakes at daycare. As for me...

My birthday falls on a Friday in '09, and I haven't the slightest idea what the plan is, because I'm not very good at labeling "what 'fun' means to me". I like Grown and Sexy sometimes, most of the time I'd rather "Broke and Boujee". I like heels and pretty dresses sometimes, but I love dope kicks all the time. It'll have to be a mix of events. If I could only get Jaycee to scratch for me (wink, wink, homie)... Now I'm excited again!

We Major...

2008-10-29T00:18:00.003-04:00

Damn Tip. I peeped this vid over at the Kaos Effect. I always kinda thought T.I. was cute when he cracked a grin but I wasn't sure why. It's those PERFECT teeth! Peep your girl Chelsea interviewing the kid. I don't think I can be more proud of Tip than I am after having watched this! She usually bulldozes people, but he held his own here...

Should Be Out Partying...

2008-10-18T22:21:00.003-04:00

It is BET Awards weekend here in the A. Instead I'm at the crib, barely eating, looking at constant Twits about the events, lamenting over the current state of my personal ish. I won't go into details but I will say that whatever happens... Is whatever happens. I saw this pic of Nas and Kelis at their last show in New York and felt like posting it. That is all.

Go Pro-Activity!

2008-10-14T21:23:00.004-04:00

So I interviewed with the people at the newest W hotel out here. The Frenchie that interviewed me was kinda snippety but whatever, it appears that I got the gig for cocktail waitress. I should be excited right? Well... I would be if- they didn't hire me, and then tell me that it would be three weeks until the beginning of orientation. At least I can keep my writing up... So I came directly home, had a Heineken or two and caught a few "Curb Your Enthusiams". Instantly brightened my day up. I never really got into Seinfeld (shout out to Wale!) but I love the cat behind it; Larry David is absolutely hilarious. Look, I even provided a clip!

I Had No Idea...

2008-10-11T14:55:00.002-04:00

Things have gotten to this point... Found this video today at the Kaos Effect about dudes and their "purses". I've gotta admit that I've never really thought about it. I mean, I stay in Atlanta, the center of Black Gay Pride, so it's something that I've gotten used to seeing. I don't necessarily see anything wrong with a guy walking around with a messenger bag if there's paperwork for work/school, or dough for the strip club in there, but there's no reason for you, as a grown man to be walking around with a purse just to be able to say, "See? It's a Gucci purse. I got bread!" Chicks need purses, like me, I have a bunch of random shit in my purse: tampons, lipgloss, candy, aspirin, makeup bag, plus the regular: wallet, keys. Everyone is gonna do them regardless right? So if I fuck witchu, I'ma do that regardless of whether or not you have a purse. I don't care that much. But it is funny.

I Can't Wait For This Album To Drop...

2008-10-08T20:46:00.001-04:00

I love Luda. Everything I've heard so far offa Theatre is crazy. I haven't been this excited since like, Chicken and Beer. I mean, don't get me wrong, I always felt that he was dope: it's like 'lackluster' for Ludacris, is still pretty damn good. I can't even officially say 'lackluster' referring to his recent projects, 'different' would be a better word to use. Peep him and Ninth in the studio doing the Spike Lee Joint! BK stand up!

"Just Be Wildin' on You/ Just Be Stylin' on You..."

2008-10-08T19:02:00.003-04:00

Atlanta DJ Jaycee posted this video a couple weeks ago, and I have no idea when it was officially posted on MTV but I gotta put it on here because it is absolutely hilarious! Just to set you up here: Jaycee put up a post about the woes of stylin' on somebody; if the dude in the first vid looks familiar, that's the cat E6 from MTV's From Gs to Gents.

Then Jay posted the next vid which is Questlove's take on the results of stylin'. Flippin' retarded! LOL!

Pretty Boy Bam Bam...

2008-10-08T17:56:00.001-04:00

Where the hell have I been? I knew nothing of this little boy until Luda's "Undisputed". I tried to box once with a friend who does it and that shit is definitely harder than it looks. He told me that I caught on pretty quickly to have never done it before but I don't even think that he as a grown man could fuck with this little boy! LOL. And he's adorable.

Realize Who You Dealing With...

2008-10-06T10:24:00.004-04:00

I effin' love Maino! Not just because he reps my hometown, but he also reps it well. I mean, it's crazy because I just posted something with his hook in the title. Apparently, this past weekend he was approached by Young Berg in the club and ended up slapping the shit outta him! It seemed inevitable, he's a little dude with a huge mouth. Jarvis saw him at Gorilla Zoe's album release party down in the city a few months ago and said that he's shorter than me (I'm 5'4") and was chasing a flat-bootied, light skinned girl around the parking lot. She obviously knew who he was, with that damn Transformers chain, but she wasn't giving him no play. A couple months after that, I saw him while I was at work at the Twelve, up in some chick's condo ordering all this food, looking at me like I should've recognized him, which I did, but c'mon, I ain't about to act like it, especially after that "dark butts" comment. He was goading me and all that too, "Hey, why you look so serious? You should smile... C'mon, you can smile with me." "I'm working. Is that your credit card?" So this was the funniest shit I coulda heard about this morning.

Maino's words: “He didn’t come to me asking a question, he was like stepping to me. If you got a question for me, ask me in a way that we can talk about it. Don’t approach me like it’s a problem,” Maino continued. “I did a little bit of God’s work, I tried to discipline him.”
“I’m a man before anything so if I’m at a club and somebody approach me in a disrespectful manner, what are you supposed to do? I don’t know how to handle it any other kind of way. I feel like I just gave him something light,” Maino added. “When you think about what could have happened…I’m around 20 people in my area and he came up to me asking me was I talking about him recklessly. I had no idea what he was talking about. I felt like I did him a favor. I tried to sober him up because something was wrong with him.”

*Spotted at The Young, Black, and Fabulous.

You See Me?/ Hi Hater!

2008-10-04T17:54:00.004-04:00

Now, as much as I respect Jim Jones and his role in the Dip Set phenomenon 'round the turn of the millenium, I can't help but feel as if someone's bitter right now. Apparently, Jimmy had an interview with Complex where he airs out how he really feels about T.I. and Jay-Z's swag:

On T.I.

"I don’t feel like he possesses any swag. Not like that. It’s fabricated. They’re watching other people, then they try and do it. You know people that dress like T.I.? You know people that go out and say let me get a T.I. outfit or do you know people who say “yo, you’re looking like Jim Jones?” Which one? Lemme hear it! When the b*tches want to f*ck you and the n*ggas want be like you, who got the swag? N*ggas with money and fame always going to look like they doing something ’cause they got the camera in front of them. But the cool dudes always stick out no matter where they at."

On Jay-Z

"...look at the Vibe cover. Tell me who Jay-Z looks like in there? Did you see the picture of him? With the Louis Vuitton scarf and all that. Who did that resemble? You can say it. But he did it wrong; he had a Gucci belt with a Louis Vuitton scarf. Who does that? You smell me? That’s like wearing one Nike and one Puma; how you going to get away with that? But I didn’t take the song as a shot, because I don’t feel like none [besides Weezy] of them possess any swag."

Can't you almost see the hate steaming from his words? He misses the point of swagger completely. Swagger is pulling the "I'm fly" shit off, and acting like, "It's nothing. I do this. I ain't even paying attention to whether or not people biting my style, 'cause tomorrow I'll be on some whole other shit." He's like a little kid with that shit. Obviously there's still bad blood between he and Jay but I felt some kinda way about his remarks on T.I. It's not like they ever had beef. I like Dip Set but I still know 'em as Harlem, and sometimes Harlemite dudes don't think before they speak. They're just loud and wanna be heard. He must have an album about to come out...

*As seen on Street Cred.

"Undisputed" Huh?

2008-09-29T20:41:00.003-04:00

Everyone get excited for November! Damn Luda. And y'all know I haven't posted a video in months, so believe that this is dope. Listen to dude flow!

*Sorry about the quality of this video, I had a dope one the first time I posted this but DTP took it back down I think...

Back to Square One (Kinda)...

2008-09-29T12:50:00.004-04:00

So working at Strip sucks absolutely! Management is disorganized and pompous and drugged up most of the time. Money is not what it should be which is a factor that's controlled by management- with a couple tweaks here and there, their employees could actually make some guap. But the well-being of their workers is of no consequence to management I suppose. So I made it to where I could get the fuck outta there- by any means necessary.

So that's the meaning of this post's title. Back to square one. On the social front though, things are moving. Everyone close enough to me knows that I want to write for a living, be it about music or clothes. As long as I've been out here in the A, this has got to be my busiest year on the social forefront.

I took Jarvis to his first Broke and Boujee last Thursday; I don't think he knew what he was getting himself into. It was fine for me, songs from the local squads and then something from the mainstream. Chicks rocking peacocks and buzzcuts with bra straps showing and kicks on their feets. Dudes with fitted jeans and flannel shirts. Jarvis sat at the bar the whole time looking like he was observing the llamas at the zoo. I danced by myself.

Before we went he asked about dress code, I told him to wear what he wanted, and that no one was gonna be looking at him that closely. "We ain't going to Velvet." My exact words. He had on cargo shorts and a Lacoste shirt with matching Adidas and his G-Shock. After we left I asked him if he understood what I meant: He laughed at my head scarf and cutoff shorts before we went in, after, he said nothing. I think he may have been a bit jilted to learn that there's a whole other world of people having absolute fun without caring about who's looking... Whatever.

On Saturday, Sheed and I were invited to go to a party at Utopia downtown, that our homie Rustin was throwing in honor of FAMU weekend. In an effort to conserve gas (and- oh yeah, ride in the brand new Beamer... LOL.), I rolled with Sheed but he and Chris had plans to go to T.I.'s Black Tie birthday party first, so I threw on the only dress in the closet (I desperately need to make a dry cleaners run), and headed out with them. The energy in the room at the Biltmore was so crazy. Everyone was so dapper and positive spirited, it was a cool change to the basic club atmosphere. Chris stopped once every five steps to dap somebody up. Radio personalities, athletes, Grand Hustle was out in full effect. Strippers danced in birdcages wearing white, curly beehive wigs and lacey undergarments with knee highs. Open bar of course. Cameras everywhere. I left the party like, "Really?" Now- to do something with all that...

Keep Your Eyes on Me...

2008-09-17T13:39:00.005-04:00

"They say I'm a bad guy/ Why's that?/ 'Cause when my back's against the wall nigga/ I react..."

Been going through a bit of hard lately people. Lost my job on a technicality. The short version: Concentrics hires a company to catch you not carding underagers. I picked up a shift for someone. We were closed. I picked up the last table and didn't even think about carding them. That's that. They called their people, I was outta a job. But I'm at Strip now. Down the street. I fucking despise it. Won't be long before I get something else. What makes it so bad, I was next in line for the supervisor position. Interviewed and everything. I didn't want to serve when I was at Lobby, now I'm back to doing that shit five days a week. For muh fuckers who don't tip. LOL. Damn. Oh well.

Me and Jarvis have been having fun though. We went to One Midtown to use my card one last time before they got wind of my failing Liquor Liability and cut my funds off. He enjoyed himself (see pictures).
I went to a gay club for the first time since I last posted. It was craaazy! I never seen so many dudes scrubbing the ground. LOL. Like, super seriously, vibrating and popping and everything. They didn't play as much rap as I would've liked but as you'd probably figure it was a lot of dance music. Rihanna and shit. It was cool though. At least I didn't have to deal with overzealous dudes pulling on me, talking 'bout, "Ay girl!".

I can't wait to go to this party though. My second Broke and Boujee ever! This Thursday! If you're in town, you should pass through. I think I'ma bring Jarvis with me. Maybe he's ready to see me in this element after seven years. Last time I took my homies Rasheed and Ronnie, we all got super toasted of course. You know me... LOL.

"I'm Never Drinking Again!"

2008-09-01T13:47:00.005-04:00

Man... Jarvis and I had a date night last night right? It was the first time I actually hung out at work on my day off. I work with some people who do that crazy shit all the time. Can you imagine? LOL. Like, of all the places that you could frequent, why choose the spot you already spent 40 hours at this week? Anyways, so, he doesn't like to go to Atlantic Station, something about the posers that stay down there- he doesn't care for The Show. And I feel him, but I make my living down there, so my issues are deeper, my issues are with the inner workings of The Show (rolling eyes).

So we close the world out and spend quality time together at Lobby. I get a Henny double straight and Jarvis gets a LI Iced Tea. We munch on sauteed shrimp and pizza. I get my Henny topped off for the free-free. I forget in the process of our drinking that all I had to eat that day was a bowl of oatmeal, three chicken tenders, and two french fries. I'm so excited to be out with my boyfriend, I suggest that we leave Lobby and walk to Strip down the street and see if Tommy was working bar. We get over there, Tom is in the place. He was more than happy to get us more alcohol, and charge next to nothing! I start to get loopy, as we walk back to Lobby, to tie up some last minute details on the rest of my night.

See, the night before, Sheed got in contact with his friend Chris. He has hellified connects: Chris gets me on the V.I.P. list for the Northern Exposure party at Esso. Me plus two right? Jarvis doesn't do parties like that, where reggae could possibly be played... No prob. Me, Sheed, Joel, and Sheed's brother were definitely going. So I finish up with the details and head home to drop Jarvis off and get changed. He was going to the "ballet" with his homie Clark to see clear heels and body stockings, LOL, so I didn't feel like I was abandoning him. By the time I got home I was sooo toasted, I got sick and said "I'ma just close my eyes for a second, sober up for a second..."

Sheeit, I closed my eyes at minutes to midnight, didn't wake up until five a.m. when Jarvis walked in. I was fully dressed, fully made up, fucking heated! Everything fell into place so perfectly, the baby was at her grandparents, who happened to be off for the holiday the next day, we had the whole night to go out and kick it, I was on the flippin' list- had a table and a bottle- Labor Day weekend! Got too drunk, too quickly, fucked it all up, and slept in. Aaaagh!

Just Checkin' In...

2008-08-27T16:27:00.004-04:00

Man, I have tons to share this go-round... First off, I went to the Broke and Boujee joint last week with Sheed and Ronnie. So much fun man. I did feel just a bit overdressed for the pink mohawk and suspender crowd, but that's the beauty of that type of spot, nobody really gives a shit about what you have on- everybody's just doing them. Hannibal Matthews was taking pics (I wish they'd g'head and post 'em I wanna see!), the liquor was cheap and the music was effing great. It was the first time I took Sheed out anywhere that had that type vibe and he said he enjoyed himself, I was happy. I bet he ain't think that there was anything like that out here, being so caught up in the "grown and sexy", which as I said before, is fine sometimes, but I mean, shit... There are other fly parties. Oh! And I finally met Maurice Garland, the writer. I'm a geek: I was like, "Hi! I'm your myspace friend!" Gimme a break, I was on my second LI Iced Tea! LOL. He was cool.

This is the next party I wanna hit. Hollyweerd is dope!

Guess who the eff I saw the other day, finer than he appears to be in pictures? Mother effin' Don Cannon! I was at work of course, at the front desk bullshitting with Rustin and he comes down from a room and requests a key or something. I'm looking like, "Is that Cannon? He's big as hell!" So I let him do what he was doing and before he left I'm like, "Don Cannon. You're crazy tall..." He just started laughing and shook my hand. I mean, really? He's like, 6'7" with perfect skin and nice eyes, he does have a lil' pot pot though. LOL.

"Fly Like a Pigeon"?

2008-08-19T15:52:00.002-04:00

Briscoe gave me that title from Wayne's "La La." LOL. I don't know. I'm feeling myself a little bit today. Sometimes you just have to. We all know we got flaws and shit but it's good to appreciate what makes you different. Twenty fucking five and I'm still getting to know myself, discovering what I will and won't take, who I am...

Anyways, I'm doing the "fashion+" blog thing, and everybody I talk to about it out here is actually kinda excited. I'm hyped too. It's fun to look at sneakers! And do something constructive with it. I'ma cover the Broke and Boujee party on Thursday. Can't wait to see what all the fuss is about...

I Get What I Want...

2008-08-07T00:10:00.004-04:00

LOL. Okay, so maybe that was a bit extra. I'm not really that bratty. But I did want to put that out there before I put these out there:

On the first of my bi-weekly runs to Wish, last Sunday, I finally got my babies! Nike released these about a month ago to Nike Sportswear dealers only, then we got 'em down here about one and a half weeks ago at Wish (of course). Ever since the first time I saw 'em with the clear sole and the purple laces- I had to have 'em! Happiness in a woman's size 8!

The Fork in My Road...

2008-07-30T01:18:00.003-04:00

So I love rap right? More than any other genre of music. I've been wanting to be a "hip hop journalist" since I was like 13. But I'd been in love with rap since way before '96. Just coming up where I did, there was no avoiding the entire culture. Anyways, as of late, Jarvis has been pushing me to get into writing about fashion. Which is fine, because clothes excite me too. But I couldn't see myself writing on some Vogue shit, which is cool also, it's just not me. I could however, do some streetwear writing, I mean if you think about it, Atlanta doesn't have ANY streetwear bloggers. And I look at least one of those type blogs everyday from either coast. With all the boutiques popping up down here everyday- Atlanta is a transplant city... Sheeit, why not? I look at new Nikeys and M.O.B. shirts for fun.

I like being me, just me, and I like to try being exclusive to a certain extent. Maybe I'm scared of doing the blog shit, because I'd be sacrificing a part of me by letting everyone else in. But how many people actually read this- or would read that? This blog thing may be an excuse for me to go to stores and look at kicks just because. So you guys may be seeing something else from me soon. Other than my personal.

Look, so I finally listened to Lil' Wayne's new one this past weekend, just because I wanted hear it after all the hype and it just so happens that I may be a bit of a convert. I never respected his rhymes as a youngun'. But remember when I was a teenager, he was a year older than me, with the Hot Boyz, and he was wack to me. Do remember, my standard is and for the longest time has been Jay... Wayne definitely has some bangers on #3 though. Especially that Babyface joint, OMG, the beat is completely retarded. But I was already a fan of Kanye right? So as far as his lyricism, "Let the Beat Build" is aiight: "I'm peepin' all y'all people different/ I pay my dues/ You keep the difference/ I can see the end at the beginning/ So I'm not racin' I'm just sprintin'". He has a couple other tracks on there, "La La", production is stupid. I love David Banner behind the boards. Anyways...

Back to work on Thursday, back to the bullshit... Dreams of this other shit....

Before I Got To Breaking Dishes...

2008-07-10T01:52:00.002-04:00

Ish has been so much better as of late. Allen Iverson had been staying at the Twelve out here all of the past two weeks. So of course for us lowly servers at the Twelve's restaurant that means big bread, but with that cheese comes dealing with the groupies that take up space drinking water, in their body stockings, fishbowling the superstar that you're serving. And I thankfully, haven't been there for most of it because those jerks have finally pushed me into demanding that they cut my mother 'effin hours down! Yeah!!

I am able to say though, that Mr. Iverson, ladies, is still fine as fuck in person! LOL. He and his entourage are also very polite, as funny as it may seem. I was at work during one particular weekend when I served some seemingly spoiled young white men (you know, frat boys) some drinks and a couple appetizers; they came in drunk but they were staying upstairs in the hotel, so whatever, I'm getting to the money right? Anyways, these barely 21 year olds get up from the far end of the restaurant and run towards the front in the cocktail area where Mr. A.I. had been sitting for most of his 14 day visit (almost as if he wanted someone to notice him- imagine that?), and shriek, "A.I., YO!! WHAT UP MAN!" and the one white boy proceeded to pull dude up from his game of spades and his bottles of Ace, hoping to dap fuckin' Allen Iverson up, LOL. This was when the entourage jumped and yoked his little ass up, carrying him out by the elbows, with his friends following him out the front door of this four star hotel, his voice cracking like an adolescent's, "Gooo.. Nuggets!!!"

So happy I'm down to P/T... More stuff went down with Mr. Iverson during his stay: from one chick demanding pictures with him (her toddler in tow), and then when rejected, carrying on with a drawn out screaming match and another singing "hymns" in a broke down soprano tone. LOL, sometimes work is interesting...

Something Else...

2008-07-07T20:59:00.004-04:00

So today I went to one of my favorite spots to shop and picked these up (above). I really didn't need any more new sneakers, and besides that, I set a budget for myself before I even went in the place. Last time I went, I copped Jarvis the LRG G-Shock and another pair of Blank denims for myself, dropped more than 3 bills. That was a week ago for his birthday. So imagine my surprise at the yearning I felt for the above kicks when I saw 'em on the display shelf. AND when I asked my favorite sales associate how many they really had in women's sizes. He told me: Numero Uno- That they only had like, five pairs left. 2. They only had one in my size. 3. They sold out of the men's sizes in a single day, as soon as they dropped. If there's anything a chick like me needs to hear in order to buy, it's: "EXCLUSIVE, EXCLUSIVE, EXCLUSIVE!"

I like these on Wayne, not so much on Lindsay... I wish I was the first in the world with 'em, but at least I'll be the first in my hood. Go Supra Tuf Skytops!

More later...

Okay...

2008-07-06T02:31:00.003-04:00

So, you get it right? Time flies... On one hand I could say that a lot has happened since my last post but then again, not much has really happened. At least, nothing to really jump around about. I still haven't really gotten the chance to go out. Or if the opportunity did present itself, I didn't have the energy to put on clothes. Not even for a "grown and sexy"party, if you can imagine that [sticking out tongue]. Last night, I was home, I'd worked the morning shift, you'd think that I would have caught a cookout or a firework or some-'effin thing, but I was in the sack- conked the eff out! I'm like, senile at 25!

Anyways, I went back home on my hustle shit. The first time I went, back in the last week off May, it was freezing! COLD, like people were walking around in North Face bubbles. Then, after I came back to the A, sold all that shit, and went back the second week of June, you ain't even have to bust a brisk walk to be drenched in sweat. The world is coming to an end...

So although I did okay selling this stuff the first time, it's harder this time. Everybody's broke, or pretending to be. Who knows. I've got another month before it's time for school again and I really would like to pay the tuition and be done with it, but I think I'ma just sell the stash I've got now and save my money from work, which can be crazy hard with kicks like these down below (teasing me at one of my favorite stores in Little 5).

More tomorrow...

I'll Be There in a Minute.

2008-05-21T16:58:00.006-04:00

So the other day, Sway and a few others from MTV checked into the hotel, I would've said something but I wanted to get my words right first. Didn't wanna just up and pounce on him, looking like a straight groupie. So I waited. The next day he and his coworkers went to T.I.'s listening party and then came downstairs for dinner. At one point, Sway walked over to the section of the restaurant where I was, checking his phone. I walked over and bit my lip.

I introduced myself once he looked up, and he was like, "Yeah?" kind of indifferent (which I was grateful for. At least he wasn't staring at my tits, which I didn't see coming from him anyway, but you know- I don't know that man). Told him I thought his Black in America piece was smart and MTV was lucky to have him, then I told him that I'm a writer in a rut, and asked did he have any advice. He flippin' introduces me to the head editor of hip hop on MTV.com, I heard his name and was like, "Oh shit." Shaheem Reid. I follow dude's work. So he introduces us. I get contact info, and I drop the word that I'm headed to NY in two days, could we meet up...
Next thing I know, before I could blink twice, I'm at 45th and Broadway in Mr. Reid's office, talking about everything...

Bladder Issues? No Prob...

2008-05-17T12:43:00.003-04:00

The ish I tell you guys about that goes down at my job is real. I talk about work fairly often on here because when I'm not posting, I'm working- or recuperating from all that working. Recuperating from what exactly, you may ask...

Well, ish like this: This past week, the hotel has had a lot of celebrities come through, more so than usual, some of the Bulls players, some Jets players, a few actors for the Tyler film that's in the works. So with the celebs, come the groupies. A couple days ago, there were three girls that sauntered into the hotel and stopped at the bar of course (you wanna be seen don't you?). They surveyed the spot and sat down close enough to some football players, then ordered one round of drinks. Just as soon as the drinks were served, and a couple sips were taken, one girl ups and pisses on herself. Right there. At a full bar. In front of everyone. Including the cats she was sexing herself up for. She ran into the bathroom and the cocktail server tried to clean it up with a towel thinking it was water. Nope. Once he found out what it was he ran around in circles carrying on, "It's pee! It's pee! I can't believe I touched it." She was in the bathroom, fifteen steps from the bar by the way, for thirty minutes, trying to dry her pants I guess. I heard that when she walked out they were just as wet as when she walked in. The football players clowned her from start to finish, to half an hour after she left. Comedy.

Next.

2008-05-13T19:09:00.003-04:00

So it wasn't long for the new gig. I'm over that shit. I didn't really have time to do much else than work. The manager is nuts. He didn't want to respect the fact that I had a first job- and it was within the same company! Whatever. We'll see if this hustle jumps off. Right now though I feel like, I'd rather chill, and work for myself as a second income. I'd be going back home on a regular basis copping stuff, so that's cool. We'll see. I leave on Monday. Jumping off that cliff...

On the Up and Up...

2008-05-06T11:40:00.005-04:00

Haven't blogged in a while. But I'd like to share that things are chill right now- outside of me throughly disliking my second job. My guap situation is about to change, my man and I have more time with each other, my baby's cute in kinky twists... Even though the African lady at the Glenwood Flea Market completely RIPPED ME OFF. How in the hell do you charge a bill to do a 3 year old's hair- even after she cut all of her hair off on one side of her head?!? There should be a discount like, "Well, I'm only doing 3/4ths of her hair, so..." I was so effin' hot that day.

Anyways, I'm about to go home in a couple weeks, get some hot ish, then come back to the A, so if anyone out there wants to reap the benefits of my hustle, scream at me.

My second job is cool but I don't know if I like working with the people. Maybe I'm just not used to them yet, but ugh... Everyone has idiosyncrasies but it seems like more exist in this place then anywhere else. I'm hostessing at the spot right? And these people serve more than 600 people for Sunday Brunch. It's like everyone around me gets aggy when it gets busy, like they can't handle the stress, and I can't work like that. I feel like: Be polite all the time, not just while it's slow. Assholes. There's an understated snobbiness, but their spot ain't nicer than the restaurant where I hold my first job. Speaking of the primary gig...

Guess who the hell I saw at work the other day: Mother Effin' T-I! Sitting out in the cocktail area with a group of friends- with a pastel flippin' button down on. He was passing through the hotel and looked over, saw his people then he went and sat down with them. I could've lost it but I maintained my cool. I'd been liking T.I. since Trap Muzik, and I think after a conversation me and Jarvis had the other day I clearly understand why. Although his flow and his lyrics are obviously impressive, that cat has a swagger like Jay. Like, "I ain't trying, this is what I do. I do this." Just so mother 'effin cool.

R-ra's Cool, Refreshing Drink.

2008-04-28T21:11:00.007-04:00

Jarvis actually put me on to this: Did anyone else catch that verse in the remix of Raheem DeVaugh's song "Customer", where R. Kelly says, "And Baby if you're thirsty/ Got some good, good lemonade..." LOL. No thanks Kells. Right before the court case?

Damned If I Know...

2008-04-17T12:47:00.006-04:00

Yesterday at work I text messaged someone who I'm just getting to know. He's one of those type dudes that always knows where the party is, how to get in, who to ask for... So we're going back and forth and I'm telling him that because I work at the spot where you see a lot of the pretentious, "grown and sexy" tackheads (both male and female), I really have to be in the mood to go to Velvet and deal with that same attitude during my off hours. I'd really have to want to get dressed to the nines and get my mind right for that environment to have a great time.

"Grown and Sexy" parties aren't really my forte'; I feel like, I'm not getting grown for this party and taking the "grown" off tomorrow. That's my life now. It's not a face. A lot of my annoyance towards that term I think is that, I go to work and deal with these people that feel like that's them and it's not- they're faking. If you don't have the guap to go out with and be for real, who are you trying to fool? No one tips 10% anymore. 15% isn't a good tip. It's aiight. Verbal tips don't pay the bills, while you're stepping out in hard bottom shoes or flimsy stillettos. What if no dude finds you attractive enough to buy your drinks tonight? What if no one thinks you're a ten? You'll be thirsty all night, or trying to make that Sex on the Beach last a few hours.

So yes, if I'm going out, "Grown and Sexy" is not my first choice. I'm not in high school anymore. I don't need to be in any clique, I'm comfortable doing me. So the guy's like, "What do you like to do? Where would you want to go that you haven't been?" I was effin' stumped. I do find that I like bars and lounges, more than clubs- at age 25. But it seems like even if a bar is halfway decent when first discovered, there's that pesky "Grown and Sexy" blanket thrown on it and all this commotion. I took Jarvis to Peters St. a couple weekends ago and there was a long line that they were holding to get into M Bar. Even Slice had a retarded line. We just left, he felt uncomfortable and there was just this weird vibe of self-importance floating around. I think I just get really bored easily, so I wouldn't mind a place like Velvet, but I need to be on some total different ish next time I go out. Some "chill, come as you are, we don't give a shit" type spot, with fly ass music, and cool people who are trying to do stuff- for real.

Right Now I'm...

2008-04-17T12:26:00.014-04:00

Pining for home...

Bustin' my ass with two...

Trying to think of a hustle...

BTW...

2008-04-10T02:53:00.001-04:00

If anyone would like to sponsor me...

I need these in my life for the warmer months, in a boys' 6-6.5 please. Thanks! :)

The Heat Was Almost Too Much...

2008-04-10T01:55:00.006-04:00

So... Your girl Mary did her thing last night. To death. You hear me? I went in there thinking I was coming to see the "old Mary in concert." You know who I'm talking about. The Mary that couldn't sing live, out of shape, breathing hard. I wouldn't have cared either way, I love Mary Jane! She shocked the hell out of me though. Mary took it back to "What's the 411?." She did "Sweet Thing", the "Real Love" remix (as you've probably heard though: Jay fills in for Big). At one point she did "I'm Going Down" and held the mic out over the crowd. Everybody in the arena was screaming every single word at the top of their lungs. Riffs, cadences and all. The whole song. She sang "No More Drama", which is definitely not one of my favorites, but she made me love it that night. She sang that track like she had a choir robe on. Started crying and everything on stage and I felt a chill run down my spine, thought I was going to start tearing up. I kept it together though. How would that look, rapping along with "Dead Presidents" tear streaked face and all?

Jay did his older ish too. I coulda really lost my mind in there when he came out to "Say Hello to the Bad Guy." He did "I Know", had the crowd repeat, then switched up the beat and brought Jeezy out for his verse on Shawty Lo's "Dey Know". Dope! When I say the crowd went effin' nuts... He did "Jigga What", "Big Pimpin'" (ugh), "Izzo", "Feelin' It", "PSA"(I was praying he'd do that one the day before). Man, that joint is crazy, and he had this video footage of rock bands going nuts and smashing up guitars and what not. The pics vibrated to the beat, the whole scene with me losing my voice, everybody throwing up the diamond: it felt like an army was coming through. Live band for the entire show. Strings and horns and everything. Fly as shit. Ooh wee!

I was like, I've been trying to go to Chicago to visit for the longest time, that tour may just be one of the reasons I finally up and go. I was tight I couldn't bring my camera in there, and the camera in my phone isn't worth a damn. Oh well.

LOL. Oh yeah. The entire time Jay did his set, there was a girl on the outside of my row hollering and screaming about, "Brang Beyonce out! Brang your wife out!" He teased the crowd with a bunch of beats at one point, two of them being "Crazy in Love" and Upgrade U". She damn near fell the fuck out. LOL. "Ohhh, oh my god! He's gon' do it! He's gon' bring her out!" She started crying and shit. Grown woman. Starstruck as hell. Of course, Beyonce did not come out last night. Puff did though, I forgot what joint he played hypeman for, but he was out there. Memphis Bleek was out there too at one point, playing hypeman... He really is straight I guess. Grant Hill was in the audience with his wife Tamia; Tyler Perry, D Woods from Danity Kane, some other local folk. It was chill.

Sweet...

2008-04-08T13:24:00.004-04:00

The moment of truth has arrived. Although I'm a fan of both Jay (supremely) and Mary, I've read that they aren't doing too many of the classics which is a bit disappointing. "Can't Knock the Hustle" is an obvious performance, as well as "Real Love." I don't know, it ought to be dope regardless. I'm still type heated that my ticket cost $90 and I'm up in the nosebleed, but at least I'll be in there. I'll post pics tonight if they allow digi cams.

I've been going back and forth about the Kanye concert. I want to go, but the arena that they're having it in is straight suburban. In a neighborhood full of spoiled white kids. I know because when my family moved out of Brooklyn, that's where we moved to: Effin' Gwinnett County. It'll most likely be a fly ass show though (peep the stage set above, courtesy of 'Ye) so if I can cope with the annoyances of well off teenagers with backwards baseball caps and open faced golds, I may still go.

"Just G'head and Strap Me Up Now..."

2008-04-04T00:01:00.004-04:00

Okay, maybe this picture is a bit extreme but that quote from the title... I really felt like screaming that shit when I walked in the house today after a ten hour shift at the gig. I worked a double today, made most of my guap during lunch and basically stood around for hours after, "working" dinner. No bread during dinner, and I basically had to beg to be cut from the floor so I could finally jump in the Maxie and kick these new Reeboks off (Classics are usually pretty comfortable. I bought 'em from Walter's for $15 the other day; I needed new kicks for work. The catch is, of course, that they're half a size too small. I pulled the insoles out and tried to rock 'em anyway. Silly me. I need to stretch 'em out.)

Anyways, Jarvis works from the early morning to the late afternoons now, think 3 am to 4pm, and that's when I'm headed to work, so he'll be tired and have to watch Keiko until I get in, around 11 pm. By that time though, most of the time, he'll be there, knocked out and she'll be into something. Before I did her hair this morning, I cut my bangs. She watched me do it, I didn't think about it until I got home, found Jarvis snoring and a pile of hair on my nightstand. Then I looked and saw my clippers on the floor. I didn't see her head right away but when I did, I coulda nutted up right there. I just felt like, as much as we do, as hard as we work, it's always something. I know it's just hair and it'll grow back and three-year-olds do that type of thing all the time but, damn. We just had a series of good days. We just had a run. I just feel like shaving her head. It looks ridiculous.

On Another Note...

2008-04-01T22:28:00.002-04:00

So I was on Mr. Garland's blog earlier and saw his post on the trend of blogs that list what People Like: i.e. Stuff White People Like, Stuff Black People Like, Stuff Educated Black People Like. I looked at the three stated above, but today's post on the White People's list was an announcement that Target had just bought their blog stating that as of today the nation’s "second largest retailer" will use the site as a promotional tool:

“We are thrilled at the opportunity,” says Ennis Blentic, Senior VP of Marketing at Target. “It’s a great chance for us to connect with some of our most valued customers [i.e. White folk? Most Valued Customers?] and let them know about our great product line for 2008 and beyond.”

I like Target too you know... [sigh] Will this be enough to make me dislike it? Damn Dollar Days...

Today Was a Good Day...

2008-04-01T21:04:00.003-04:00

Started off at the optician running an errand that I'd been putting off for a minute. Initially I was excited about just doing that, such is the life of a family woman, the little shit is appreciated. Anything other than the everyday, going to work, paying bills, pulling your own anecdotes from jerks at the job- anything else is... Euphoria.

Okay, so done at the eye doctor, all is good and paid for. Off to school, thinking positive, like "maybe I can work out a payment plan or something with these people." No such luck but maintaining positive vibes, I decided to take my licks paying for school outta pocket again next semester. Keiko and I stopped off in Little Five for pizza, then I saw that this spot had been renovated and dropped by:

Got a Hellz Bellz shirt and a couple of the Drama/ Re-Up Gang mixtapes. Flyness! I also saw that they had my Everybody High Sodas in stock:

Couldn't cop 'em though. They didn't have my size anymore, because of course they're primarily made for dudes, so there are only a couple pairs of 6.5 or 7s in any retailer that sells 'em. Oh well. Saw a pair of Reebok Pumps in there though, ooh weeee... Hella dope. I used to be bad with sneakers and exclusives in general- like bad. But of course you get older and you get over that shit, my primary thing now is Keiko, so even if I look crazy as hell, she's chill. Got her these today without meaning to buy her anything:

Still, at this point, I kinda feel like regressing a bit. I've never really been that girl to wear a dress and heels on an everyday basis. I always needed to be at least up on the latest ish, especially "streetwear", even if I couldn't afford it. I mean, not specifically being shallow, but I think a part of it was being from Brooklyn and being raised in that kinda atmosphere. I'm 25 now, had Keiko when I was 22, I feel like, I'm not 50, but I damn sure feel like it sometimes. I used to jump and do whatever the hell I wanted to, whenever I wanted to. But I was starting to feel like by getting older, I was expected to lose my style, so I dropped a little bit and by the time I had her, I was expected to drop it completely. Anyways, I came up with this: Ima cop what I want and wear what I want until I don't feel like it anymore. Like I told Joey last week: "Nobody's gonna tell me I'm not 25 because I've got Dunks on, on my off day instead of blouses and shoe boots."

This Dude is So Authentic...

2008-03-31T02:35:00.001-04:00

Scales of Justice. Part Two.

2008-03-29T01:28:00.004-04:00

Y'all heard about Remy Ma? Well, apparently, while Tip Harris was walking out of a federal courthouse with his hands free, Remy was handcuffed and escorted deeper within the walls of her respective courthouse, sobbing cries of what I'd think was a bitter mix of shock and dread. Mind you, I hadn't been following her particular case too tough, but I couldn't honestly say that I thought she'd be seriously punished. Even her lawyer Ivan Fisher said, "Remy's taking this really, really hard. She didn't anticipate this." Nah, ya think?

What allegedly happened to put Remy Ma in this situation: Last summer, she and a girlfriend were out, Remy suspected that the friend took three grand from her, according to the friend, she didn't take the money, and when she told Remy this, it fell on deaf ears and Remy proceeded to shoot her in the gut. Okay?

I googled Remy Ma and it seems like every news site has this story up (As a side note: Why does it seem like you never see the positive shit hip hop's involved in on these sites as top stories?). I didn't see anything about her having a crazy crime record or anything before this, so I guess she really was like, "Naw, first offense. I'll be home in a bit."

What she said happened as far as the gun going off, sounded crazy as hell: She and the girl were in the car wrestling over the gun and it "just went off". The prosecution argued that with it being the type of gun that it is, she'd have to cock it back with two hands consciously before it could be fired. And it was loaded up with hollow points. Tsk [shaking head]. In saying that, there's no way in hell that the gun could "just go off." That's where she fucked up.

Even if she said that she didn't have the gun with her the whole time and someone else could've cocked it back and left it ready, that would've sounded less crazy. Anyways, she could've killed that girl. Thankfully, she didn't lose her life. It's sad to see someone else in a position where they could've just had fun living life, possibly making a positive difference in anything, headed to the big house for who knows how long. She's facing 25 though. Five- at the very least. Dumb mistake. Sometimes it's okay to be lame and stay at the house and make music, polish your lyrics or whatever. She's 26 years old.

The Scales of Justice.

2008-03-28T00:51:00.008-04:00

Y'all heard about Mr. Harris? Well, it seems T.I. has gotten a very light slap on the wrist. Within a matter of weeks he went from looking at twenty-five/thirty years for those pesky gun charges, to getting a year of house arrest, three years of pissing in a cup, fifteen hundred hours of com service to "at-risk" youth, $100,000 fine and possibly one full year in prison and all that is based on his behaviour and ish- of course...

What woulda happened if he didn't change his plea? He waived his Miranda rights in the first place all those months ago, that fateful day of the BET Awards, when "'em people" got him in that Publix parking lot in Midtown. He knew then that he was fucked basically and started talking without a lawyer. I think that he definitely wanted to put himself in a better position than he would've been in had he just been like, "Man, I know y'all got the tapes and shit, but that ain't my voice. I don't even know what a machine gun look like in real life."

He was going 'not guilty' at first though and people were worried and what not, like, "Damn, that's it for that nigga." But now that he got off type easy to be a convicted felon (almost everyone I spoke with expected- years) people were calling the radio mad as hell. In a sense, I feel them. It's not fair that your cousin was a convicted felon, got caught with guns and got years. But how does anyone in good conscience curse a defendant (who didn't in actuality hurt anyone-not at the time anyway) for not getting enough time. Are you serious? And then scream favoritism, like T.I. is a 21 year old blue eyed frat boy whose parents paid for his college ed at Notre Dame. Since when did popular rappers who came from nothing, came from the hood with a criminal record to boot, since when were these cats favored in the courtroom? Usually they try and throw 'em under the jail. That shit is laughable.

Jarvis told me the realest ish though, what makes the most sense: Money. I mean, T.I. isn't in the top ten percent but he's caked up a bit. More than your ex-con cuz. But then we need to admit that the justice system obviously isn't fair and that's unfortunate. Jail is a business, everyone knows that (every Black person that lives in a city should know that), so should it surprise us that the institution (the courts) used to put people in jail/prison is about that paper as well? Different consequences for different people. It's like, the hardest lesson to learn: Just because she did it and didn't get caught doesn't mean you can do that crazy shit. What 's happens to her may not happen to you. Vice versa. Part Two tomorrow kids.

"Y'all N----z Ain't Tired Right?"

2008-03-25T21:01:00.003-04:00

One [one], Two [two], Three [three], Four [four]... Breathe easy.
Yeah I'm on my Jay ish today. I dunno, maybe even after the show in a couple weeks, we'll see hon.

I know this though, I'm catching my second wind "as soon as the first one end/ I-M focused man". Sorry, I couldn't resist. Seriously though, I'm overwhelmed but I think I'll make it. Tired of the mundane but I'm fine. My homie is doing his writing thing (officially-trust me when I say that) and the other day he was real with me like, "Either shit or get off the pot." LOL. Never heard him talk like that before so I was like, Okay for real now, no excuses. So here I am, "in great shape dunny."

"All I Neeeed..."

2008-03-25T12:42:00.009-04:00

Some fresh Alifes...

A couple stacks...

Sandy beach and some sun on my back...

Some more hours- just in one day...

Oh and one of these bad boys...

[I know you ain't think I was gonna bust a rhyme...]

Could've Gone to This...

2008-03-22T20:47:00.003-04:00

But of course your girl had to put in four thankless hours at the gig, leaving early anyways, but with no extra outfit in the trunk, here I am at the house, waaay over on the Eastside, sharing this with all of you.

I still have a couple of hours before the Clipse/Re-Up Gang go on, I've been a fan for a while. But I'm especially curious to see what type of crowd they bring out. I recently heard that they have a hellified indie rock following, if you can believe that...

Anyways, it would've been nice if I could've covered this and stuck it in the portfolio. Que sera. There will be others.

"And You Say New York City!"

2008-03-20T22:54:00.000-04:00

Guess who got their ticket? Finally. Jarvis isn't a fan too tough ("Why he always talkin' 'bout himself? Can't he rhyme without talkin' 'bout himself so much?" LOL.), so he's not coming. I will be there, toasted, with the homie Shid by my side, reciting lyrics from the summer of 9-6. "Slick like a gato, Mano a mano, you ain't ready..."

We Need a Flippin' Vacation...

2008-03-20T22:25:00.000-04:00

I feel like I'm going stir crazy. Obviously not from sitting in a 4 X 6 ft. prison cell for months at a time (the literal meaning) but doing the same thing day in and day out with no scheduled break from the monotony. I swear, I feel like pulling my effing hair out. I shouldn't complain, and usually I try not to, because, really, I could be doing much worse. I think maybe we just need to get away though. There's so much that I still need to do. I'm at work and the people that come in act as if all I've done in life and all I'm good at is taking their orders. "I want the Hanger steak. Got that? The Hanger steak. Okay?"

I miss school. I miss having assignments and projects. But what can I do? At this point I've got to work, so if we could just break away, even for three days- I'd feel a little bit better. Last year we didn't even go far, and we didn't go flashy, we went to Clearwater, FL, just me, Jarvis and Keiko. She was acting up but it was chill just to be somewhere other than home for a weekend. Ima do something though before I throw a steak knife at someone's head in there.

Why Are We Still On This?

2008-03-16T00:54:00.000-04:00

One of my supreme pet peeves is having someone tell me that I'm pretty- to be dark skinned. I absolutely hate hearing that. It's really prickling to hear it from a Black man. Especially when he's a couple shades lighter or darker than you. It would be so much better to simply say: "You're pretty." What's so hard about plainly telling someone who happens to be of a darker complexion that they are beautiful without any of the "even though"s or the "although"s.

A friend of mine, super Afrocentric, follower of Islam, I like him a lot- but today, he got a little bit tipsy and he called himself complimenting me with that. I was almost mortified but Jarvis always tells me not to let that stupid shit bother me (he's my shade). I was annoyed, but I can't call our friendship off because of that. It's sad but the truth is: that mess is deep rooted in our culture, it started in slavery times! If I cut everyone off that thought like that, I'd probably have three friends/associates.

He was like, most dark skinned girls that he meets: they are either self conscious about their skin tone or they hate light skinned girls. At that point I looked at him like, "Go on..." But I still didn't get why he would think that his compliment was well worded. The white girl he said it in front of looked puzzled. Maybe she didn't think that went on within our race- I dunno.

I can't speak for every dark skinned girl, but I know that growing up in NY City, around Puerto Ricans, Dominicans, Columbians, Asians, white kids and light skinned Black kids; I never felt like I hated them because they were lighter than me. I never felt anything about my dark skin. I just knew that it was mine, I never wanted to change it. Never thought I'd be "better" if I was lighter. Most of my family is dark skinned with dark eyes. I never felt like I needed to "make up" for my dark skin with aqua green contacts.

It's crazy, but it wasn't until I moved out here to Georgia where I felt like I was "less than" because of my complexion. I went through my little culture shock when we first moved like, "Damn, am I ugly? Were all the boys back home lying to me when they said I was beautiful?" After a while, I got my swagger back and just said "Eff it. I know I'm fly. They're just not up on it yet. Ha!"

I think within ourselves that skin tone shit is deep- deeper than anyone wants to admit. That's why you got females in the Carribean and Africa bleaching their pretty dark skin to high yellow. That's why so many talk about light skinned friends and relatives with pride and what not. Bragging on how light their eyes may be. I don't think that the "hate" that my friend spoke of came from nowhere, I believe that it's obviously a resentment of the light skinned girl rather than outright hate. Our own people made it that way. Perpetuating stereotypes.

Jarvis says that in some circles, the girl could be "ugly" as sin, but if she's light skinned she's good. Darker girls don't get a pass with that. After years and years of going through that, some girls are going to have a effed up attitude about the subject, like they hate light skinned girls. Some light skinned girls are going to see that they have that advantage (in certain circles) and they are going to behave as if they're privileged, or better. Of course, that's what they've been hearing their whole lives, from almost everyone. Why not take advantage?

Now I'm preaching. So I'm ending here. My final word is this though: Jarvis and I are both dark. Keiko came out brown skinned. I think she's gorgeous- the prettiest baby in the world, but I'll be damned if I let her think that it's because she's lighter than...

Damn I'm out the Loop...

2008-03-13T23:46:00.000-04:00

I went to somebody's trap page the other day and heard "Telephone" by this girl. I'm kinda digging her. Kid Sister's on some house ish, but not straight techno. She calls it "ghetto house". Anyways, I don't usually like anything that even remotely sounds like it could be go-go, but her stuff is cool. It's good to see a female come out with something different and creative. Keep your eyes peeled.

I also need to cop the new joint from this insightful lady. I've been loving Erykah since age 13, not always realizing the depth of what she was saying until I went through my own ish. I heard it debuted at #2. A must-have. Most definitely. BTW, isn't this cover dope? Tip has always had this kind of underlying sexy, doncha think?

And finally just so y'all get the full idea of just how far out of the loop I am. I'm a native Brooklynite. Born at Brookdale. Raised in East New York. Went to Lincoln H.S. in Coney Island. Okay- so Heart of the City is coming to the A in about a month and guess who doesn't have their ticket yet. I know I'm slipping but this family life is no joke. Whenever I get ready to buy it, something else comes up. It's always something that a responsible adult would take care of immediately. So I'm trying to be responsible.

My homie from D.C. is begging me to stop playing and cop mine this weekend. He already has his. I'm thinking of ways to swing Creative Recreations for Keiko, new glasses & contacts for myself, and a ticket to see Jay. I'm not exactly young, hot and single anymore! Well- I'm still hot- at least a lil' bit! LOL.

"I'm On That Grey Goose... Do I Know You?"

2008-03-06T00:47:00.000-05:00

Sometimes- okay it's getting to be pretty regular now, I drink- a lot. Well, not a helluva lot, but enough. I mean, after Keiko is asleep and her daddy's belly is full and we're all just on some chill ish. He and I get on it. Real life- busting your ass, working blue collar or service type jobs [sigh], when you clock out and forget that you work where ever it is, you try to forget for real with a snifter of that brown or a rocks glass of that white. I'll probably look at this post tomorrow like what the hell was I thinking but [shrugging shoulders] whatever. I'm on that Grey Goose...

I was in contact with my secret mentor recently. When I say "secret" I mean, she had no idea before I told her some years ago. I didn't even know her. It was so random too; I remember being thirteen, maybe fourteen years old reading her pieces in Vibe like, "Man, she's so eloquent. She just flows. I hope I can be like that one day. Where my pieces make someone feel like that. She's absolutely dope." And a few years ago, I was messin' with Kanye's publicist at the time, and we talked about aspirations. I mentioned dream hampton as a part of my inspiration and he was like, "I know her. You want her e-mail address?". And that was that. Jarvis always says to me, "You're lucky enough to speak with someone that had that much of an effect on you. A lot of people don't even have that, a lot of people don't even know what they wanna do." I love that I am able to ask her for advice, or questions, or whatever. It's flippin' great! Okay is the 'tipsy' showing now? I'm out.

Boy, I Really Need to Read More.

2008-03-04T01:04:00.000-05:00

That's something that I'd been telling myself for what feels like the longest time now. After the loop repeats for a while: just working and coming home, watching a bit of TV, jumping on the i-net- I just feel like a damn dummy. Like, man, I need to go to Borders and just walk around. LOL. Just be in the presence of a book or three.

The other day, Jarvis, Kamaia and I had our weekly family outing (which due to our schedules, seems to occur about once a month now). We went to the mall hoping to tucker this tireless 3 year old out enough where she'd be napping as soon as we pulled back into the garage in 60 minutes. We went to Stonecrest and window shopped for a while. He did a bit of actual shopping at DTLR, then I wanted to go to the bookstore. I realized again why I like to do that type stuff on my own. The baby was restless and Jarvis was getting antsy. I didn't even get a chance to browse like I wanted to. I went in there to see if they had this Kanye book that I'd heard about on his blog. But there were a few others that I'd wanted to check out too. I had to cut the whole visit short and get the hell out of there, before Miss Keiko started terrorizing bookish patrons sitting in comfy looking chairs enjoying plots and scenarios. Next time, the fam stays home.

Money in the Bank?

2008-02-27T23:47:00.000-05:00

D-E-A-D! That's what work was looking like today. Had me feeling like, why did I even come in? But it's all good. I made my little bit of cheese here and there. I had a funny type guy at one of my tables tonight. I guess he was an ex NBA player or some ish. Anyways, he's out with a young lady who looked like she was scared to death of speaking above a whisper in front of him. He was pretty forceful. He sat down and was immediately adamant about a server- ANY server, changing the channel on the TV facing his side of the restaurant, to a Hawks game. When he saw that we have Direct TV and not basic cable (where you could see the game local) he was just exasperated.

"Just turn to a game. ANY game."

Fine. So we did. For the rest of the evening he was just real funny style. I can't describe it to regular folk unless you've ever worked in the food service industry. Everytime I came to the table, he was talking- either to 'ol girl or to somebody on his cell about his big plans in the works or whatever weird shit he was talking about. I didn't really hear the young woman speak until they were about to leave. It was like he wanted everyone to know that he was a "somebody." Before his meal, he was waiting on 'ol girl at the bar, and he demanded that the bartender change the channel on the TV facing him. Oh brother.

As soon as they sat down and I did my little spiel, he's like, "Where are you from?" I wanted to roll my eyes, because I can anticipate the question and I never see the point in discussing such minor details with guests unless I feel comfortable with them.

I tell him NY.

"Yeah, you know, I used to live up there." Like he wanted me to recognize his glory days on the court or where ever he was doing whatever he was doing up there.

"I can tell, It's just that you said 'y'all'." I told him that when I was home, I said 'y'all' I just don't have that drawl with it. I never did. He's not even really listening to me though, I could tell by his comment after:

"Yeah, you can't avoid that Southern [slang]. It just sticks to you once you're down here." I wanted to suck my teeth and tell him that I rep Brooklyn to death but my man and my daughter are from the A, so Southern doesn't bother me. Ass. Anyways, I sound like I'm giving your boy a hard time, so let me sum it up with this: This grown man, 'bout 6'4", 240, orders the roasted boneless chicken breast and says, "Ima need them to cut my chicken up. I don't want that big piece just sitting there." Right.

Uh, Never Mind...

2008-02-27T12:34:00.000-05:00

So I was on some Hennessey and Diet Coke the other night, when I decided to get on Myspace, you know, just to get on there. I'm "friends" with a particular magazine that I'd always wanted to write for-professionally. I actually got as far as being considered within an inner circle of folk for their summer internship program. But alas, I didn't make it to the final whatever, so I sorta got knocked off my ish for a while. I was so upset-second guessing myself and everything, anyways...

I was on Myspace, and I was just a little bit toasted, when they sent me a bulletin, saying something about sending your pics to the NY office, if you think you look like a celebrity. I'm not usually one for trying to get fifteen minutes in the spotlight. I'm not that girl. I'm satisfied with playing the low key role, but it was the Hen! I sent the guy a message saying, "I've been hearing that I look like Rudy Huxtable since I was 4." He hit me back twice since like, "Send it in. Here's the address." Now I'm like, Umm forget it. I mean, I guess it could be okay but, I'm grown, sending pictures in to magazines. I guess it's not that serious but what if I did end up writing for them one day. "Hey you're that Rudy girl!" Ugh!

Hmm...

2008-02-26T13:28:00.001-05:00

What's the matter with this dude? I hate to admit this but he's hilarious. His ideas would be scary if they weren't so far-fetched. But he's so "off-his-rocker" that he's someone to laugh at. Mira!

I Just Need My Ends Clipped.

2008-02-26T13:11:00.000-05:00

"We don't do ethnic hair here."

You're a hair stylist though? Really?

Random Nonsense.

2008-02-25T02:03:00.001-05:00

So I'm at work today, already aggy, as there were a million things that I could think of doing besides being there dealing with the one table I had all evening. Anyways, so I'm there and the room service phone rings. Let me get into the foolishness that follows:

"Good evening, In Room Dining."

"Yeah, umm, I'm trying to order some food."

[I'm thinking, 'Obviously.']

"For what room?"

"Uhh, I live here. [Condo] 3605.

"Oh TWENTY SIX-05."

"Naw, 36-05"

"Sir, we don't have a 36th floor here. We only have 26."

"How you gon' tell me where I stay at?!? You acting like I don't know where I live at! I stay in 36-05! 36-05! 36-0..."

"Sir could you please hold?"

And I hit the 'hold' button so I wouldn't have to snap on his ignorant ass. If he would've given me half a second I could've saved his stupid ass from taking extra breaths, carrying on and shit. I hit 'resume' and he's still screaming and hollering, presumably to someone in the background.

"She tryna tell me I don't know where I live. I know where the hell I live 36-05! Sheeit, gon' tell me. She talking 'bout there's only 26 floors. Sheeit... She don't know what she talking 'bout."

"Sir, thanks for holding." [I said this with the sweetest smile in my voice, like I didn't even hear him acting a complete ass. Not that he woulda cared.] "Sir, do you live at the Twelve Centennial Park or the Twelve Atlantic Station?"

"CENTENNIAL PARK!"

"This is the Twelve Atlantic Station sir and we only have 26 floors." ['asshole']

[slight pause over the phone, but no apology of course.]

"See, I don't know why they transferred me to y'all. I live here, shit, well, that fall back on them. That's they fault. Aaight."

"Mmm hmm" [click].

I'm so tired of dealing with people who don't know how to deal with people. I gotta get on so I can stop doing this shit. But it was laughable- this time. Sometimes you don't feel like dealing with them though.

Do It Now!

2008-02-09T00:58:00.000-05:00

So I have FIVE years to thirty. As of last Wednesday, the 6th, your girl is a whole 25 years old. I just wanted to lay in bed the whole day though. Looking pathetic. When 2008 began I was like, "Ima make a change, for real, I'm going to make a series of serious, positive changes in my life." It wasn't one of those wack epiphanies that people say come January 1st. "Ima lose weight" or "Ima save more money." It was a real deal realization within myself like, "Shit has GOT to change this year. No more excuses left and no more time to look back and say 'Damn, I shoulda...'" But it still bothers me when I think about it.

I can't complain about my life too tough though. My little girl just turned three. She's happy and healthy and she's just started dance class on Saturdays. She's so funny, she doesn't know too much now, but she knows that she LOVES dancing. So how can I be mad at anything? The most important person in my life is good so I'm good. Generally speaking that is...

Careerwise, I've been working on this book off and on, and I know that I should be tackling it head on but I just don't have the energy or the peace of mind most of the time. Nick Cannon is down here in the A this weekend, throwing a party for the launch of his new magazine, Style and Substance [raising eyebrows]. He's staying at the hotel I work in, and it wasn't until the last minute when I thought maybe I should ask him for the magazine's contact number. I couldn't get to him then. S Word!

Jarvis told me that I should really try to watch my language around the baby. She dropped something today and was like, "FUCK!"
He said, "KAMAIA! What did you say?"

"Sorry Daddy! Sorry! I sorry Daddy!"

"Who you learn that from?"

"Mommy say that, Mommy say that. And she tell me 'Don't say that word!'

Awful. LOL. So I picked that up from a couple girls I work with. Instead of cursing for now, I'll be like "S Word!"

Peace and Love,
Nadine G.

"What- You Ain't Interested?"

2007-08-15T21:23:00.000-04:00

That's how this guy in a "50 Cent Wifebeater" came at me today. I'm leaving work after a very long shift and he sees me lighting up (bad habit, I know), asks for one, says "Thank you ma'am...", then says, "Come on baby, please put my number in your phone." I had to laugh, because I was kinda in a daze so I wasn't even really paying attention to him (I don't see guys anymore, I've got mine- I just see bodies). His body was banging but his game was see-through. I'm like, Young Man I know what your approach is: Lemme flatter her then flatten her. Cute- but not really.

So today was my third day of training, and it is getting a bit easier although the menu is fucking crazy. There are endless ingredients in everything, some of them are Italian, so I have to learn how to pronounce them, as well as remember what item they come with. The wines?!? OMG! Forget about it. The list is like, four different languages.

I'm training with two dudes, both of them haven't gotten on my nerves as much as they did today. We're not allowed to smoke either, so you know I was ready to choke the both of them.

There's a young gay dude who was like super top notch server supervisor for these folks, and he says that although the money was retarded he had to leave because the management sucked. He talks about it all the damn time though, to everyone and anyone who's even halfway listening. He's nice and always willing to help, but he's always bringing that shit up. Since us new folk have to travel together throughout our shift, me and the other cat have to hear the same flippin' "horror stories" everytime someone asks "So where'd you guys work before?" He goes into a 10 minute monologue. The same 10 minute monologue every time. Geez.

The other guy is an older man from Greece. He talks really slow like he wants to give everyone enough time to pay attention to what he's saying 'cause it's sooo important (nothing to do with his accent, he's been in the States for 18 years), and asks questions about what the trainer may have repeated three times just before, even common sense shit.

The young one is skilled but if I'm asking the trainer something he cuts in with his own answer; he trys to stump the trainer it seems like- or he tries to prove that he knows so much more than anyone in there- and he's new. I feel like, "Damn dude, fall back. Humble yourself. We know you've been doing your thing for a while, but you don't have to scream it."

They both interrupt you and they talk over you if you try to take attention away from them, so I chill and wait until the trainer says something to me. No big thing though, I think I just have to get used to not relying on Newports when I get irritated.

Nadine G.

Daaa-daa-daaa! Wait Till I Get My Money Right...

2007-08-15T00:09:00.000-04:00

Long time right? I know. Been a bit busy. So I left off looking for a writing gig. Well, I got one writing for Insite Magazine down here (an independent catering primarily to city dwellers from college age to young adults in their early 30s). I've been doing movie reviews during the summer and hopefully, if they'll have me, I can stay on until I graduate from State-ugh, whenever that happens. I can't afford school this semester so that's yet another semester off and that means I'll be doubling up for the Spring but whatever...[sigh] Ima dance across that stage when I'm done.

I reviewed this French film My Best Friend. Cute movie. And Sicko. Really informative. And Bratz. Nothing new there- a story about friendship enduring tribulation, same old- apparently everyone else felt the same. It bombed opening weekend.

I also got a new job! In Atlantic Station! At the Twelve! Slinging those plates as usual but a lot classier- slinging for a lot more money. Yes, your girl will get her bread up. It's a foodie's paradise, with a lot of ingredients in the kitchen, a lot of bottles behind the bar, and a hell of a lot of cheese flowing through the joint. Feel me?

Nadine G.